


Neither A Man Nor A Woman

by ssangvely131



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Almost Crack, Dirty Talk, HEX - Freeform, LMAO, M/M, Smut, be nice to fortune tellers junhoe, blowjob, bobby has a massive crush on junhoe, downstairs apartment, guy loses his dick and has to fuck a guy to get it back, iKON - Freeform, junbob, junhoe has a pussy, lie detecting toy, poor junhoe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-03-02 17:18:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18815455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ssangvely131/pseuds/ssangvely131
Summary: Junhoe makes the mistake of talking down to a bitter fortune teller who puts a hex on him. The following day, Junhoe wakes up to a surprise. His legacy, his pride, his glory, his magnificent dick was gone, like gone with the wind. In its place, the genitals of a woman.The only way to return to normal is to well, use it. But on who?





	Neither A Man Nor A Woman

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this was a crazy idea I came up with at like 2 AM and I just had to write it. It's crazy why would I ever think about it why did i write this lmaoo
> 
> Anyway, hope you guys like it. Leave some kudos or comments below if you do. Thanks for reading!

"You have a what?!" Jinhwan choked, his small crescent eyes a full moon staring up at Junhoe who flinched to the sound.

"Keep your voice down," Junhoe groaned. "You want everyone to find out what's going on?"

"Uh yeah? I think we have to tell everyone."

"No!"

"Junhoe, don't be stubborn. This is serious," Jinhwan remarked sternly, his arms folded across his chest, meaning business.

"I know what to do, okay?"

"Then why did you come freaking out to me?"

"Because… ugh, this is weird," Junhoe whined, throwing his lanky body on Jinhwan's queen size bed. He wished the bed instead engulfed him deep into the unknown, away from all of this.

Jinhwan tilted his head, catching on a little late. "You went to see that fortune teller again, didn't you?"

"I didn't think she could actually make my dick disappear and turn into a freaking vagin-"

Jinhwan shushed him with a harsh tone and Junhoe realized he was again too loud.

"I mean, I didn't think she'd actually put a hex on me!" he whispered a shout.

"Well? Did she tell you how to fix it?"

Junhoe gave a sheepish nod. This could not be good.

Jinhwan gave a tiny snort and hopped onto the bed beside the younger. "Serves you right for making fun of her anyway."

"Yeah that makes me feel so much better, hyung."

This was Koo Junhoe's reality. All because he sort of made fun of how fortune telling is a load of crap in front of an actual fortune teller. His magnificently sized cock, his glory, his pride, his legacy, has suddenly vanished.In its place, the gate of which he exited to enter this world. Koo Junhoe had a pussy.

"So what did the fortune teller say?"

Junhoe's dark, depressed eyes swerved to Jinhwan's direction and the older could immediately read him. Junhoe wanted to go drink bleach like it was his whiskey than push through with the cost of returning his manhood.

"Sweet! We actually get to keep this?" Bobby chortled, inspecting the lie detecting toy.

"Be careful with that," Donghyuk bantered, seeing his hyung turn the toy upside down and almost dropping it.

"I am careful!"

"You almost dropped it!"

"Ah, Donghyuk-ah is so noisy!" Junhoe's familiar bellow of rage echoed from his room.

"Bobby-hyung was yelling too!"

"Your voice is more annoying!"

Bobby cackled vehemently, pointing his finger to Donghyuk.

"So noisy!" Jinhwan interjected with his nasal voice.

"We'll be good, we'll be good!" Bobby hollered after them, a big grin on his face. He loved it when Junhoe scolded Donghyuk but not him, not that Junhoe was in any place to scold anyone, being the number one troublemaker.

Seeing the glow on Bobby's face irked Donghyuk so much, he wanted to concoct a dangerous situation for his hyung.

"Let's see if it works with Jinani-hyung and Junhoe," he snatched the toy from Bobby's loose hold and strut up to Jinhwan's room where the two were. Bobby simply followed suit, too much in a good mood to foresee the plot that was to unfold.

"You guys really got to keep that?" Junhoe looked at the toy with a flat expression.

"Neat, right?" Bobby tried to strike a conversation with him but Junhoe snorted it away.

"I'm a good liar, y'know? That thing doesn't work on me," Jinhwan bluffed and shrugged his shoulders blithely. Junhoe looked at him sideways, wondering why he was taking such an interest to it. It's only going to be fun for 10 seconds.

"Put your hand in then," Bobby shoved Jinhwan's hand onto the contraption with dubious consent. "I jerked off in the shower today. Go!"

Almost speechless, Jinhwan laughed silently but played along. "I didn't do such a thing."

Donghyuk pressed the button and the boys waited silently for the toy to pass its judgement.

"No way," Junhoe fought a laugh, almost anticipating the ding that validates the honesty of the person in question.

Buzzz!

"Ah- ow!" Jinhwan snatched his hand back in pain but laughing at the same time. The other boys cheered at the expense of his nerve endings.

"Why does this one hurt?" the oldest complained, shaking the electrical sensation from his victimized hand.

"Because it's the truth, hyung. I saw some of your leftovers in the drain," Bobby teased but immediately raised his hands up in defense as soon as he saw Jinhwan's eyes widen.

"You think you're so funny?" Jinhwan hid his threats under a dangerous half-hearted grin. Bobby could only laugh as his hand was forced next into the toy.

"I think of Koo Junhoe when I jerk off. Go!"

Bobby felt something get trapped in his throat. That was unexpected. His eyes turned to Junhoe but the guy was busy avoiding his stare anyway. Good. Wait, was this good? Not knowing Junhoe's expression right now was tantalizing.

"What are you saying? No!" Bobby laughed nervously as Jinhwan pressed the button.

The boys anticipated the lie detector's results once again. Bobby's mouth ran dry while waiting. It felt so much like an eternity, a bead of sweat formed on his temple and rolled down the side of his face before a decision was made. No way.

No way.

Buzzzzz!

"Aghh!" Bobby's face curled in pain as he plucked his zapped hand out of the machine. Donghyuk and Jinhwan gave a loud cheer but Junhoe's trembling laugh in the background was all Bobby heard. This was gonna be so awkward afterwards.

"Better watch yourself, Junhoe," Donghyuk jeered, giving his friend a slap on the shoulder.

"Or better, it's time to make a move," Jinhwan added and winked, giving Junhoe a knowing look.

"HA HA," Junhoe gave a loud fake laugh in their faces and rolled his eyes. "Why don't we take turns asking about what we jerk off to. That's real mature."

The fire in Junhoe's eyes was real. They teased him and unleashed the animal within. Nobody one ups Junhoe when it comes to stirring trouble. The downstairs apartment became a mess because of a toy lie detector that night. Jinhwan eventually got to throwing it out the window in the end.

But the damage was done. Junhoe couldn't stop thinking about if it was true or not. If it was, then maybe, just maybe, he had a chance at regaining his manhood again.

 

Bobby was going to apologize to Junhoe. He didn't do anything wrong, well not directly. The situation was out of his control but he still felt that he needed to apologize in person. Not that he had Junhoe's number in the first place.

The rapper stood in front of Junhoe's room. He could hear soft music playing. It wasn't a song he recognized though. It was old, maybe from the 80s. He swallowed his pride and knocked on the door.

"Hm?" Junhoe hummed to acknowledge him but that still wasn't an invitation to come in. At least that's how Bobby understood it.

"It's Bobby-hyung," he successfully fought a stutter. "Can I come in?"

There was a pause before he heard the music being shut off, followed by heavy footsteps approaching the door. Here he comes.

Junhoe opened the door, his hair dishevelled, his white shirt wrinkly from doubling also as his pajamas along with those black adidas track pants he was so obsessed with.

"What?" he asked, nonchalantly. Bobby suddenly froze.

"Uh... about earlier," the older started, playing with his fingers. Having Junhoe look at him was so rare, it actually felt suffocating, Bobby had to avert his gaze to the less intimidating floor.

"I was nervous so the toy zapped me. It wasn't because I was telling the truth," Bobby started fumbling over with words, his poor Korean and whatnot showing. "I would never."

"You would never?"

Bobby looked up. Why did Junhoe sound so disappointed? Maybe it was just his imagination.

"You mean, I can?"

"What- No!" Junhoe got all flustered. "I mean it's okay."

"To jerk off to you?"

"Yes- I mean, no! I meant the whole like lie detector thing. I get it. It's not supposed to be accurate," the younger did his best to make a point. It was almost embarrassing how loud his voice was getting with Bobby. That was rare. "It's just a toy," he finished.

"Yeah."

A long pause followed. The atmosphere was so suffocating, neither could speak. One of them wasn't being honest and that was painfully obvious. Neither of them had the balls to directly point it out though.

"Hyung," Junhoe started again. He had to make a move. He needed to.

Bobby eyed him sideways, somewhat afraid of getting caught.

"Do you... would you really not do it?"

There it goes. Those words put together in a sentence, in a question, directed towards Bobby. Junhoe finally said it. It took all the courage in his system to actually release those from his own mouth into the world.

"Ah..." Bobby felt his throat go dry. Was this a hidden camera? He was actually having this conversation with Junhoe? Sooner or later, they had to face this anyway. The sexual tension they refused to acknowledge that made them so conscious of each other's actions. The root of their awkwardness.

"You're a real good looking guy, Junhoe, I told you that many times. You're tall and you even work out a lot these days too."

"Meaning?"

"You're a sexy guy," Bobby almost laughed. Saying it sounded so wrong even though he meant it with his entire being, he cringed at himself. "You know I like you a lot."

"Yeah but that doesn't answer my question," Junhoe's impatience showed. He had a hex to undo and he had to know if Bobby would consent.

"Um, you sound like you want me to say yes."

"Maybe I want you to."

There it goes again. The words Junhoe thought he'd never have to put together. Out there in the world and right out of his big mouth.

Bobby stared at him in disbelief, his small eyes looking big for once.

Junhoe scratched the back of his neck, out of words, before pulling Bobby into his room by the wrist. It would be hella risky if Jinhwan or Donghyuk found them talking like this.

"Junhoe?" Bobby almost shrunk away, having the younger suddenly pin him against the back of the door as soon as it closed.

"Hyung..." Junhoe swallowed his embarrassment. His heartbeat was erratically pumping blood to his flushed face and ears but he fought against it. "Would you... with me?"

"Huh?!"

"This isn't easy. Stop overreacting!"

"I'm not! I'm just-" Bobby stopped himself, raising his arms in surrender. He studied Junhoe's face intently. He was bashful, flustered... and strangely desperate. "What... why do you suddenly want to?"

Junhoe averted his overbearing gaze but refused to let Bobby escape the grip on his shoulders. "I'm... I just gave it some thought," he hesitated. Should he tell Bobby the whole truth? The hex? No way, it would be weird to show him. But if they do have sex, he's bound to show it anyway.

"You've never even been with a guy, Junhoe," Bobby tried to reason, seeing as though the younger was rushing the process. "It's different with a girl, y'know?"

He wanted to roll his eyes so bad. It can't be different from doing it with a girl because he had a pussy right there between his legs! Bobby seemed to like him as a man though so opening up about his hex situation was difficult.

"I... I'll be the girl," Junhoe decided.

"Uh-huh..." Bobby gave him a weird look again, still wondering why he was being so pushy about this. Junhoe sensed Bobby's doubts and thought he'd get right down to it before it worsened. He got on his knees and unbuckled the older's belt and pants.

"I'll take care of this first if you're not in the mood."

"Do you even know how?" Bobby's grin widened to one side, still in disbelief. Junhoe's never even had a boyfriend or been with a guy. He has no experience. And to do this straight off without even a single kiss.

"I studied..." Junhoe admitted, a light flush on his cheeks. He looked so much like a boy on his knees with his doe eyes looking up at Bobby.

Junhoe tugged Bobby's pants and underwear down, only low enough to expose his still flaccid cock. It... wasn't the size Junhoe expected it to be. To think he wasn't hard yet.

"You're staring," Bobby pointed out, combing his fingers through Junhoe's fringe affectionately. If Junhoe was so willing to suck him off, would he be mad if Bobby suddenly rubbed his cock on his pretty face? The rapper didn't take the risk.

"I'm just getting ready," Junhoe frowned, trying to hide his gulp just now. He's seen Bobby's before but not this close. As he drew closer, his warm breath glazed over the exposed organ. Bobby couldn't help but give a restrained exhale from the sensation.

"You want some pointers?" he suddenly teased to relieve himself of the tension.

"No, I said I studied," Junhoe mumbled pressing a soft kiss near the base of Bobby's cock before starting with a slow handjob. His lips were soft amd his hand perfectly wrapped around him. Bobby was about to lose it. This wasn't supposed to happen, was it?

"Your hand's a bit dry," the rapper commented, trying not to sound so eager about the ordeal.

Junhoe looked up at him, studying his expression, and gave the palm of his hand one long sloppy lick. Bobby swore he felt his dick twitch just from looking at that. Junhoe gave him a few strokes again, this time wet and slippery from the saliva. "Better?"

Bobby reached down and caressed Junhoe's cheek, wiping off some spit left on the side of his mouth. God he was so pretty, Bobby suddenly wondered what he did to deserve a guy like him suddenly want to do this with him.

"I better not feel any teeth."

"That, I can't guarantee you," Junhoe shook his head slowly before licking a long stripe on the underside of Bobby's shaft now erect from just a wet handjob. It's embarrassing, he knows, but how can he resist?

Junhoe gave small nips along one side before wrapping his lips over the head, his tongue slotting over the slit. Bobby suddenly doubted if Junhoe's ever given head before. He didn't even notice he started breathing heavily now.

Feeling Bobby grow harder by the second, Junhoe hollowed out his cheeks, his lips still wrapped around the tip before pushing down, slowly swallowing Bobby whole. He felt some teeth along the way, which kinda hurt, but Bobby forgave Junhoe anyway. He felt unbelievably warm and wet and hollowed out cheeks made it feel tight. Watching Junhoe's head bob up and down, his pretty face getting mushed against his pubes over and over.

"Hahh, Junhoe," Bobby let out small gasps, restraint obvious in his throat. "I'm gonna cum in your mouth," he warned, but just then Junhoe slowly pulled out, his mouth to his chin wet with spit.

"You can't," he groused, his voice huskier with abuse. "We're... having sex, right?"

Bobby could've sworn his cock couldn't get any harder but it just did. Junhoe didn't even need to ask so politely like that.

"Do you have any condoms in here?" Bobby suddenly remembered. They don't bring home dates or anyone for that matter into their rooms. How could Junhoe have any of that in this hermit of a man cave?

"We don't need any of that."

Holy shit, Junhoe wants to fuck raw. Bobby's brain was at the verge of short circuiting from excitement.

"Also... can you close your eyes when we do it?"

"We can turn the lights off."

"I want them on."

"But you don't want me to see anything? Kinky."

"Shut up," Junhoe's entire face flushed. Bobby wanted to kiss him so bad. But maybe that would cross the line. Junhoe wanted to have sex so maybe sex was all that was allowed right now. No kissing.

He followed the owner of the room to his bed and was made to lie down on his back. Was Junhoe going to ride him at this rate? Wasn't this his first time?

"Also can you not touch me once I get on top of you?"

"You're setting up a lot of unsafe rules here," Bobby feigned a complaint and laid his head on top of his hands at the back.

"I'm letting you fuck me. I can say whatever," Junhoe feebly argued back in contrast to rolling up Bobby's big shirt over his stomach, chest but not past his head. "Keep this over your face."

"Yessir," Bobby agreed diligently and held his shirt in place. He could faintly make out Junhoe's outline through it but not the details. "Seems a bit unfair I let you see my dick and I don't get to see yours though," he joked but Junhoe frowned. He had to hide it at all cost. This was going to be so awkward if Bobby saw a pussy between his legs instead of his cock.

"I'm letting your dick inside me. I think it's completely fair," Junhoe did his best to quit his voice from trembling as he tugged down his bottoms and underwear, that was unexpectedly drenched. Guess giving head got him more excited than he thought.

"Okay," Bobby chirped, mind and cock ready as ever.

Junhoe threw one leg over Bobby's hip, facing away from the rapper just in case he snuck a peek and would see everything. This was so embarrassing. Even if he does undo the hex and get his cock back, how was he supposed to face Bobby after this? Well whatever, he can worry about that when the time comes.

Before sitting on Bobby's erect cock, Junhoe gave it a few more tugs to keep it that way, stalling the moment, musing over how it's gonna fit. It fit in his throat just fine, it's gotta fit up his pussy just fine too right?

"Hyung... I'm gonna do it," Junhoe said in almost a whisper, spreading his legs over Bobby, positioning his cock over it after rubbing his clit a few times. He wished he could rub Bobby's cock over his clit but that would pretty much give away what he had between his legs right now. He spread the lips of his pussy before settling down, the head just pressed against the entrance.

"When did you lube up?" Bobby asked, still holding his shirt over his head. A guy's asshole doesn't lube itself up like a girl's pussy does with slick. Junhoe needed to think quickly.

"I... was playing with myself... before you knocked."

"Fuck, that's hot."

Ugh, Junhoe wanted to die. How is Bobby not turned off already? Or rather how turned on can he get? Guess he really does like Junhoe more than he think he does.

Junhoe slowly lowered his hips, the head just pushing it's way past the entrance now. Junhoe was scared this was gonna hurt but Bobby couldn't help but offer some encouragement.

"Go slowly if you have to." One of the rapper's hands made it's way to Junhoe's hips against orders.

"I told you... not to touch me," Junhoe whimpered, still finding consolation on the hand on his hip rubbing comforting circles on his hot skin.

Inch by inch, he felt Bobby infiltrate his insides. It felt so hot and he was obviously throbbing. It felt so weird and perverted to have a cock inside him like this.

"Good boy," Bobby praised him and Junhoe wished that didn't affect him in any way.

"It's not all in yet," Junhoe exhaled, realizing he was holding his breath just now.

"Relax. It'll be easier if you relax."

Junhoe tried to follow his advice. He tried to relax his muscles and his cock slid straight into him.

"Mmh!" Junhoe fought a moan, the first thrust fully inside him now. He wasn't so sure he was gonna get used to this kind of girth that he can move his hips freely.

"Shh, relax," Bobby reminded him from behind, slowly rolling his hips, grinding the insides of Junhoe with his cock. "You'll get used to it. Just a bit longer."

"Stop moving," Junhoe whined, feeling too sensitive. He's never been touched like this before. He's never had anyone be so deep inside him like this. It was so hot, he felt like Bobby's cock was gonna melt into him any second but it remained as hard as before.

"Ugh, it feels so good," Bobby shamelessly commented.

"Shut up! Hah-"

"Shhh, the others might hear you."

"Then stop."

"Can't. Ugh, you're so fucking tight," Bobby almost groaned. Much to Junhoe's surprise, he felt Bobby sitting up behind him, feeling a chest on his back and arms around his stomach all of a sudden.

"I told you not to... ah!" Junhoe tried to peel the arms off of him but he was losing strength fast, feeling Bobby thrust into him once without fully pulling out. It was so deep inside him, he couldn't take the sensation.

"Ugh, you're too deep. Pull... out," Junhoe whimpered but rolled his hips back against Bobby. It was starting to feel good before he knew it.

"Are you feeling it too much?" Bobby teased, holding the younger's hips in place. Not thrusting too hard. Donghyuk and Jinhwan might hear and come running to the room. "The door isn't locked, is it?"

Junhoe felt a wave of anxiety. It wasn't locked, fuck. But he had more pressing issues right now.

"Just... shut up," he hissed, holding Bobby's hands in place, hoping it doesn't touch him elsewhere. "Just fuck me. Fuck me."

"You're loud," Bobby grinned ear to ear but reminded again before nipping at Junhoe's red ears.

"Do something... hh... about it."

Against his expectations, Junhoe was shoved face first into his bed, his ass raised up by his bent knees. Fucked like a dog.

"There, just moan into the blankets," Bobby teased, quickening the pace of his hips. Junhoe was losing his mind. Maybe it was just his imagination but he felt like Bobby could hit him even deeper from this position.

"Ahh, fuck!" Junhoe cursed as Bobby hit a certain spot. It felt so good, he thought he'd pass out. "Ahh, hyung! Hah!"

"You're so loud."

"Mmmhah! Bobby-hyung! They'll hear," Junhoe mewled into the sheets, trying hard to silence himself but stuffing his face with blankets was too suffocating. Jinhwan and Donghyuk were bound to hear them at this point.

"Bet you they're listening right now."

"No... hhah."

"They know I'm fucking you right now," Bobby kept making comments into Junhoe's ear, knowing his breath must add points to his sensitivity.

"No... hahh..." Junhoe moaned, drawing heavy breaths every thrust he felt inside him, growing more and more intrusive.

"Fuck, I wanna come," Bobby remarked breathlessly, his lips pressed to the side of Junhoe's head, beaded with sweat underneath his hair. The blowjob earlier already did half the job and it's been so long since Bobby actually blew off some steam like this so he was overly sensitive today.

"Ahh... don't mess up my sheets," Junhoe whined, still thinking about how much of a hassle laundry is even when he's having sex.

"Then I'll fucking cum inside you then."

The very thought made Junhoe's hole clench. His body was ready for it but his mind, not so.

"Don't-"

"I'm gonna cum in your tight little pussy. How's that?" Bobby panted heavier into his ears. It was so perverted and dirty. It was driving Junhoe to the edge. It was terrifying how much he realized he loved Bobby's dirty talking in his ear.

"Hahh, s'not in my pussy," Junhoe cried almost incoherently. "Ahh!"

Bobby's head was far too messed up at this point to care, feeling Junhoe's walls clench against him. He was close too. Bobby spilled his hot cum inside and Junhoe thought he was gonna melt at this point for real. It was an alien feeling, being used to cumming from a dick but he guessed that thing he just felt must have been what it's like for women to cum since he felt sated after.

After a few lazy thrusts to calm down, Bobby pulled out and rolled beside an equally breathless Junhoe. They stayed that way until the high that came from sex subdued.

\---

"Whoa," Bobby almost laughed. "We had sex."

A little irritated by the feeling of now cooled cum inside him, Junhoe turned his head away. "You're crazy."

"Not as crazy as you," Bobby grinned, reaching over to give Junhoe a massage by the shoulder. The younger willingly accepted and almost drifted off to sleep from how good it felt. "So... are you gonna tell me about it?"

"About what?

"Where your dick went."

Junhoe's heavy eyes peeled open as he creamed his neck to face Bobby this time. "My what?"

"You were so fucking wet. I knew I wasn't fucking an asshole," Bobby cackled, rolling unto his back, arms comfortably under his head.

"I... uh... it's a long story, okay? A fortune teller put a hex on me so I had to have sex with you in order to get them back!"

"A fortune teller? What?" Bobby was so confused but just decided to not ask for details for now. The full story could wait. Maybe over drinks. Ugh, he wished Junhoe could ask him out again after this.

"It's complicated, okay?"

"I see. Well..." Bobby's smile fade slightly and Junhoe saw.

"I'm sorry. I sorta tricked you. And yeah."

"It's fine. I'm happy in a way."

"Because we had sex?"

"Besides that. To undo the hex, you had to have sex with a guy, right? Just any guy?"

"Not really-" Junhoe sat up, feeling embarrased again. "It had to be with a guy who made me question my sexuality."

"That's even better?"

"Huh?" the younger felt like shrinking away again, having the older sit up and suddenly taking him by the wrist.

"That's me!"

"Yeah, it's you."

"You like me."

"I... I'm gonna clean up," Junhoe scrambled on his jelly limbs off the bed to maintain as much distance as possible now. "You can get out of my room now."

"Ouch," Bobby pretended to be hurt.

"I mean it. Get out."

"Don't I get a kiss at least."

"Maybe next time."

Next time.

Bobby gathered all his clothes under one arm, grinning and walked past the still frozen Junhoe. "Alright then. Next time! I'll hold you to that."

Bobby shut the door and suddenly Junhoe was left all alone with the dirty sheets, dirty clothes, and dirty thoughts. The clock read 1:14 AM. Time for a shower.

The next day, Junhoe got his genitals back and never made fun of fortune tellers ever again.

 


End file.
